[ Here is what Astarion knows about attachment, of any sort: it's best to be avoided. Even this is a risk, in that respect, despite his confidence that he can come out of a (real? fake?) date without catching feelings. When he'd still lived at the Palace, he hadn't really had to worry about it, considering that anyone he brought back would be gone in a matter of hours, if not less, and it wasn't as though he or his siblings held each other in particularly high regard.
(And the one exception to the rule had taught him better. One man, early on, who'd been so sweet, so earnest, so tailored to tug on Astarion's heartstrings, that he'd let him go. The consequence — an entire year spent locked in a tomb, alternating between wishing for death and scratching his fingers raw and bloody against the stone — hadn't, in his estimation, been worth it, and the lesson learned has made him unwilling, if not outright averse, to entertaining exceptions again, even if Cazador can no longer really do anything about them.)
But there's no real way around the fact that agreeing to go out on a whatever-this-is isn't motivated by anything other than curiosity and perhaps a little selfishness — the desire to have fun and be admired on his own terms, to not have to give away anything more than a smile or maybe a kiss. ]
"Not so terrible"? Trying to make my heart flutter with praise, are we?
[ The second part of that message, he leaves well enough alone. What he knows how to be is what Cazador had made of him — but he doesn't want that, anymore. ]
As you are, if you like.
[ It's not like he's actually going to set ground rules for something that's supposed to be an uncomplicated good time. Besides, he's had enough of being molded by someone else to feel very keen about doing the same thing to someone else — or at least someone he actually likes. Well, finds interesting, anyway.
So: ]
Let's save the idea of demands for a second date, shall we?
[ And, just in case that alone is too much pressure on their commitmentphobic selves, a quick follow-up: ]
Unless this is your way of telling me you'd like to hear more compliments, as I'd be happy to oblige that particular request.
no subject
(And the one exception to the rule had taught him better. One man, early on, who'd been so sweet, so earnest, so tailored to tug on Astarion's heartstrings, that he'd let him go. The consequence — an entire year spent locked in a tomb, alternating between wishing for death and scratching his fingers raw and bloody against the stone — hadn't, in his estimation, been worth it, and the lesson learned has made him unwilling, if not outright averse, to entertaining exceptions again, even if Cazador can no longer really do anything about them.)
But there's no real way around the fact that agreeing to go out on a whatever-this-is isn't motivated by anything other than curiosity and perhaps a little selfishness — the desire to have fun and be admired on his own terms, to not have to give away anything more than a smile or maybe a kiss. ]
"Not so terrible"? Trying to make my heart flutter with praise, are we?
[ The second part of that message, he leaves well enough alone. What he knows how to be is what Cazador had made of him — but he doesn't want that, anymore. ]
As you are, if you like.
[ It's not like he's actually going to set ground rules for something that's supposed to be an uncomplicated good time. Besides, he's had enough of being molded by someone else to feel very keen about doing the same thing to someone else — or at least someone he actually likes. Well, finds interesting, anyway.
So: ]
Let's save the idea of demands for a second date, shall we?
[ And, just in case that alone is too much pressure on their commitmentphobic selves, a quick follow-up: ]
Unless this is your way of telling me you'd like to hear more compliments, as I'd be happy to oblige that particular request.